| I'll love you forever and I'll like you for always As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be. |
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| "you cant be INTENSE about someone forever.. you get so drained out"
You might be right.
I am so drained out...yet im still doing it.
(there.....a "special update" for you. So quit crying. lol. I don't do this very often)
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| The world's greatest.
by R. Kelly
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| I wrote a long ass entry....but i decided not to post it.
Instead, i just want yall to know i tried, and i failed. And i need u guys now more than ever.
For the past few months...I have come to realize how important school
is. This might seem stupid to a lot of you, but for me this is a huge
step. I realized if i don't start trying in school, i am going to be
one of those people making 5 dollars an hour at Wendy's or McDonald's
after i graduate. I don't go out and party every other night anymore, I
don't spend my time playing basketball and working out everyday
anymore. I might not be studying 24/7, but i honestly i try. If i am
not studying, i would be sitting at home trying to convince myself to
study. Yeah, the TV might be on. The xbox might be on. But hey, at
least i made the effort to stay home and to open the book. And when
tests come along, i do work my ass off, and i do get decent grades.
Yes..i could've done better, but i swear to god i am improving, im
trying. It just takes time for the transformation. From the old me...
to the new one. I am sure yall know wht i mean.
However, not everything is working how they are supposed to be. I am so discouraged....
If only i had money to buy a gun(okay this part is a joke. im not that stupid)
Have you ever felt that u are trying so hard at something, and u think you are good at it and ur moving ahead, but then u realize u are really not?
It's like... you can see your goal right in front of you, and you try SO DAMN HARD to move forward, to run towards ur goal, hoping u can reach it as soon as possible, but after a bitch ass run, you realize ur on a tredmill...
I feel so lonely
God, I need your guidance..now
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| Like Max said... I really should update..I meant to do that this past weekend...but school is just too much. There's like 3 more tests this coming week.. and im still working on my history essay right now.
A PHAT update with PICTURESSSS coming soon tho.. i promise.. haha. yall better enjoy it
better go back to the essay
later guys
stay tough
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